And Life Goes On
by tallie85
Summary: Less than a week after the final battle, can Harry and Ginny overcome the grief and find a way to console each other? Post Hogwarts, H/G and mention of R/H, angst, romance, now COMPLETED.
1. Chapter 1

The atmosphere felt oppressive, the air thick and humid as the mourners gathered around yet another casket, watching as it was lowered into its final resting place. This was the twelfth funeral Harry had attended and he didn't know how much more he could take.

He'd promised he'd go to every funeral of those who had laid down their lives for him, for all those who had sacrificed the most precious thing to enable him to defeat Voldemort. It was the least he could do to show his respect. It made him so mad when the _Daily Prophet_ tried to hail him as the saviour, when really these people lying six foot under were the true heroes. Listening to the last words of grieving widows, sons and daughters, he felt something draining away from him with each attendance.

He watched as Mrs Weasley threw a single rose upon the coffin below before turning and burying her face against her husband's chest. He saw tears as every other Weasley followed in the same suit: Arthur, Bill, Charlie, Percy, Ron, Ginny, until at last it came to George. He muttered some final words to his departed twin, before throwing his own rose down, looking for all the world as though half his heart went with it. Charlie passed him a shovel, pausing for a moment to squeeze his shoulder, before George He heard Hermione sniff from beside him, tears falling down her face. He felt his own resolve falter and he put an arm around Hermione. Blinking rapidly, he looked back over to the Weasleys. They were embracing each other. His eyes sought out Ginny, who was currently in Ron's arms, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. Their eyes met and he saw more pain in those brown eyes than he ever wanted to.

The devil voice inside of him taunted him, saying that it was his fault that Fred was dead, his fault that this caring family who had dared to take him in as one of their own was now one down, his fault that George was no longer himself. Another small part of him sighed in relief that it was Fred and not Ginny that had been hurt, and then he immediately felt guilty for thinking such things of his friend. His chest was getting tighter and he was finding it hard to breathe. He couldn't stand it any longer; he had to leave. He stood up, and looked away from Hermione's questioning glance.

"I've got... to go," he mumbled and left, feeling two sets of brown eyes burning into his back all the way.

* * *

It was sometime after sunset, but not too close to midnight, as Harry looked upon the waters of the Great Lake. He sat with his back against an old oak tree; his favourite thinking spot. The half-moon shone brightly down upon the grounds, bathing the waters in a pearly glow. The night was still, apart from the Giant Squid moon bathing on the far shore. The grounds were not a hundred percent returned to their former state, they never would, but the castle looked as it had done before the battle. In his hands he held the fabled Elder Wand, twisting it and twirling it as he let the relentless onslaught of guilt, anger, grief, regret and relief run free.

So much had happened in the past week that he really could not comprehend it all. Voldemort was dead, the Death Eaters had either followed their master – which the majority had - or relinquished their wands. Only the Malfoys had returned to the 'good' side. If there even was such a thing as a good side. Both parties had caused the other grief, too many prejudices and grudges had been held. 

Well, at least now was as good a time as any for a fresh start. Still, rebuilding was a long and painful process.

The funerals had started three days ago, starting with Colin Creevey and then followed by the fifty other students and people who had died in the battle. He was saddened that Tonks and Remus' funeral was only slightly more attended than Snape's. Guilt and anger rose within him when he thought of the greasy haired Professor, of the sacrifices, of all of the misdeeds he had done. It was ironic that the Dark Lord's closest servant understood and was driven by the one thing Voldemort didn't understand: the power of love. For years, his greasy professor had held a flame for his mother, but his upbringing and pureblood prejudices had ruined it all. Instead, he had bitterly watched as his father and mother found each other, giving them up to the Dark Lord by mistake and then having to live with the consequences until the day he died. Back in his first year, or even right through until a week ago, if someone had asked him whether he'd actually ever respect Snape, he'd have told them they were ask barking as Trewlawny.

He had never been afraid of death; he had been more afraid of dying without completing his mission. But his thoughts kept straying back to that half-world. He felt as at peace as he had ever done then, the grief and pain and suffering left behind. He felt a strange longing to return to that world, just to leave all this behind.

"_Harry, suffering like this proves you are still a man! This pain is part of being human..."_

Unbidden, those words spoken in reply to his selfish teenage rant in Dumbledore's office two years ago came to mind. He couldn't run away from these feelings and after seeing what Voldemort had done to himself, he was in a very big way glad that he wasn't like him. He shook his head, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. Glancing down at the Elder Wand, he felt the responsibility lie greatly upon his shoulders. For the rest of his life, he couldn't be beaten so that nothing like this would ever happen again. The magic had to die with him. He had told Dumbledore that he'd put it back where it belonged, but he was starting to have doubts about doing just that. The thought of disturbing his mentor's grave, despite the fact that Voldemort had already raided it, was not at all appealing to him.

He just wished that there was someone here that could help him understand what had happened and work through what needed to be done. Even after Dumbledore had gone, his instructions found their way to him from the grave. Now, however, the absence of any guidance left him hollow and somehow lost. He could not even pretend to comprehend everything that had happened, only just enough to get the general gist of things. Having survived, Merlin alone only knows how, avenged his family and freed those from Voldemort's tyranny, he felt a strange ... he didn't quite know how to describe it. For what seemed like ever, he had refused to think about what life could be like if he did survive, in the fear of being fearful of death. He'd been so consumed by the Horcrux and Hallows hunt that now it had come to an end and with a whole future stretching out before him like a blank canvas, he felt hesitation as to where to place the first brushstroke.

For what was the first time in a handful of years, Harry Potter began to seriously take a look into his unhindered future.

In terms of immediate action, the Elder Wand was number one on the list. And he felt like he owed it to the school to finish the restoration of Hogwarts. After that, the last remaining Death Eaters had to be rounded up, although that was probably going to be left to the remaining members of the Order or what was left of the Aurors. As for a career...he only had his OWLs. He groaned at the thought of going back to school next year, after everything that had happened, but what other options did he have? As saviour of the Wizarding World, his ambition to be an Auror seemed appropriate, but without NEWTs, he doubted whether he could actually get on the training course.

He sighed. So many choices. And then there was the decision of where to live. Hogwarts had really been his only home, and there was no way in hell he was going to go back to the Dursleys. Grimmauld Place had too many gremlins. Although he was sure that Mrs Weasley would insist he stay at the Burrow, he wanted a place to call his own. An excitement started to build as he explored the possibilities of his future.

And then there was Ginny. He closed his eyes, picturing her flaming red hair flying out behind her as she flew on a broomstick. He remembered those times just relaxing in the common room, those stolen moments in broom closets, those glorious afternoons spent in secluded places within the grounds and the secret moments on the Quidditch pitch after hours. Ginny was one of the best things that had happened in his life and was one of the things that truly kept him going this past year. Because of her, he had been unafraid of death. Because of her, he was able to defeat Voldemort once and for all. He was so very proud of her, standing true, tall, proud and courageous throughout it all. Even now, when she had endured so much pain, he had been unable to comfort her. He winced in remembrance of the moment when that green spell flew so close to her head that he thought she was a goner. He felt wrenched when he had heard her cry of disbelief when he was being carried in Hagrid's arms.

"I'm so sorry, Ginny," he whispered out into the night.

He wanted to hold her, to comfort her, to protect her from anything like this happening again. He wanted to wipe away her tears and be the one to comfort her. She had shared with him some of the experience she had in her first year, but now she was truly free to set her demons to rest. He felt great satisfaction that Voldemort could threaten her no longer.

He twirled the Elder Wand one last time before deciding that now was the time to get rid of it before anyone became too curious. It was far too dangerous an implement and too many people knew its true identity for him to try and protect it for much longer.

"Forgive me, Professor," he whispered, not relishing the thought of what he was about to do. Taking a deep breath, he pulled the cloak on properly, vanishing totally into the dark. Dumbledore's tomb it had to be.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: You may recognise the first few lines of this chapter as they are from DH and the final battle scene. Thank you to all of you who take the time to leave encouraging reviews._

--

"_Harry Potter is dead. He was killed as he ran away, trying to save himself. The battle is won. Come out of the castle, now, kneel before me and you will be spared."_

_Her heart dropped to the ground when she saw his rag-doll like form clasped in Hagrid's tender hold._

"_No!" she heard Ron and Hermione shout in disbelief from next to her._

"_Harry! HARRY!"_

She woke up with a start, her heart pounding, fever-like. Haunting figures of the nightmare vision slowly faded as she came to her senses. She blinked around, adjusting her eyes to the darkness of her dorm in the Gryffindor common room. Her mother was in the bed next to her, the heavy snores characteristic of the dreamless sleep draught. She now remembered her and Ron refusing to go back to Aunt Muriel's after the funeral, instead insisting that they wanted to stay at Hogwarts. Her father was almost stationed at Hogwarts at the moment and her mother didn't want to be alone without her children, so they all found beds at Hogwarts. It wasn't that difficult; the majority of people had left for their own homes, finally free and safe.

It was no use trying to go back to sleep. She'd been plagued by nightmares for a long while now and she knew that she would find no rest for the rest of the night. Now awake, her thoughts attacked her with a great ferocity. Shaking her head in an attempt to force the grief from her mind, she sat up, feeling the aches in her body. Her left arm was still sore, despite Madam Pomfrey's ministrations everyday for the past week. She silently got out of bed, grabbing her wand from the bedside table. She ran a quick comb through her hair to get rid of a few of the tangles and quietly walked to the door, glancing at her mother as she opened the door. As she looked at her mother's peaceful face, she had a quick thought: her mother would worry if she woke up and Ginny wasn't there. She waved her wand, leaving a quick note, before leaving the room.

"_Lumos_," she whispered, lighting up the way down the staircase. The common room was empty, not surprisingly. Climbing through the portrait, she made her way through the corridors and outside, careful to avoid the attention of the few people milling around.

"_Nox_," she whispered as she saw McGonagall deep in discussion with Kingsley and her father just past the entrance of the Great Hall, discussing no-doubt, yet more boring school administration issues.

She let out a sigh of relief as she went through the Great Doors, breathing in the fresh air. As she did so, she felt some of the weight lift from her shoulders. Having lived in a secluded farm house in the countryside, she hated to be cooped up and always relished the first breath of real fresh air and the freedom it promised.

"Ginny?"

Startled, she whipped her wand around in the direction of the voice calling her name, only to find Harry materialise from underneath his cloak.

"Harry! You startled me." She let up her wand and held her hand to her chest as she gazed at him. She couldn't see much of him in the darkness as his figure was silhouetted against the grounds.

They hadn't exactly been avoiding each other for the past week, there just hadn't been the opportunity to talk. She got the feeling that he felt slightly awkward around her, and to be honest, she felt the same. They had shared so much, but so much had happened since then that neither one of them knew how to talk to each other again. Besides, the funerals had sapped the living life out of her, particularly today's, and the fear of adding to the sorrow was too much to bear. The hope was all that had kept her going for so long now that she didn't know how to survive if she lost it.

Her thoughts flashed back to the last time they were alone, up in her bedroom in the Burrow on his birthday. She'd let him know that she'd be here waiting for him when it ended, so it really was up to him to make the first move. Still, this was Harry and she knew him well enough to know that he would have trouble doing just that. Maybe it was fate that had brought them together tonight, so perhaps it was a good opportunity to finally have that conversation. The problem was, how to start it?

_Come on, Weasley_, _where's that Gryffindor courage_?

But before she could pluck up anything, she heard voices behind her. She spun around, her mind already processing a hundred excuses for being up this late. They were in plain view of everyone; what was she thinking staying right outside the entrance hall at such a late hour? Fred would rise from his grave in disgust at her. Damn Harry; he always had distracted her from keeping her senses. She saw her father and Kingsley appear, followed by McGonagall from the entrance hall, but before she could move, suddenly Harry was pressed up against her, his arms enclosing her from behind as he threw the cloak around them. She went stiff as a board, her breath hitched and her heart started racing as she felt his arms tighten around her shoulders. Through the gauzy fabric she could just make out the figures coming towards them.

"The charms are going to take some time to restore, Minerva," came Kingsley's booming voice.

"I don't deny that, Minister, but we have to open in September," McGonagall replied.

"Do you trust me?" She felt his hot breath on her neck. She couldn't find her voice, but gave a nod of her head. His arms gave a squeeze of what she thought must have been appreciation before she felt him move one arm down to her waist and wave his other hand. She felt the world squeezing in around her, and she realised Harry was Apparating them somewhere.

"Yes, well, I'll see what we can sort out. I'll pop by later this afternoon, need to have a word with Harry if I can catch..."

She didn't stop to think about where they were going or the fact that it was her father she was running away from as the voices became distant and the world disappeared in blackness.

--

Harry looked around, checking to see if the coast was clear even as his senses came back to him. He really did hate Apparating, but there hadn't been time to summon a broom. Anyway, trying out two person flying for the first time at night probably wasn't the best idea when the father of the girl you had your arms wrapped around, the Minister of Magic and the Headmistress of Hogwarts were only metres away from you.

Seeing that there was nobody in sight, Harry became aware of just where exactly his limbs were. One arm was wrapped around Ginny's waist, hugging her to him. Strands of her hair were tickling his nose and he could smell the familiar flowery scent of her shampoo. He could feel her stomach rise and fall in quick succession as her breathing came quick against his arm. He felt his face heat as he realised just how much he had missed her, had thought about her. Now she was in his arms, he wanted to stay like this, to hold her and protect her forever. But would she let him with everything between them?

"Where are we?" he heard her whisper. He reluctantly dragged his mind away from his musings and withdrew one hand to cautiously lift away the cloak. He still kept the one arm around her waist, prolonging the contact he knew would have to end soon.

"We're somewhere deep within the Forest of Dean. Somewhere near the border of Wales," he added when he saw her questioning glance. "We spent quite a bit of time here last year so I guess it doesn't surprise me that it was the first place I thought of to escape to."

This particular part of the Forest was the most remote. It looked exactly as it had when they'd left, all sign of human habitation magiced away by Hermione. Although not that far in the past, it felt like a lifetime away. No longer was he with Ron and Hermione, scraping an existence off of wild mushroom soup and whatever berries they could find and sleeping in an old tent that smelt of cats. No longer did he have to spend his watch sitting on that rock under that big tree, hoping, wishing, praying that he would get to see the girl standing in his arms again before it was too late.

"It's beautiful," Ginny murmured, pulling away from his encircled arm to explore the moonlit glade he'd Apparated them to. He immediately felt the loss of warmth from where her body had been pressed against his. She walked away from him, taking in the beauty of her surroundings and he felt his heart ache. He had always enjoyed looking out at this view at night or in the early morning, often wishing he could show her this. It had given him hope that even though there was so much sadness and suffering in the world going on, that such places could exist were just a mystery to him.

"When it was my turn for watch, I used to sit on that rock there, just watching everything that was around me." He was almost whispering, the sound seeming to intrude upon the serenity of their surroundings. She continued her exploration, her attention focussed elsewhere. "The best time is just before dawn when the woodland creatures wake up to get the morning dew or when the dear and rabbits come back in to sleep."

He felt really strange, almost melancholy, but more at peace than he had been since the visit to that world. He watched her, not far from him, her back to him, the moonlight muting all the colours but her hair. He didn't think anything could ever dull it.

"I can imagine. There's a field not far from our garden that's just like this, although not as enclosed. When I'm home, I used to sneak out to watch the bunnies chasing each other." She bowed her head slightly. "Sometimes Fred and George used to join me, though they could never stay quiet for long enough so no rabbit ever came near us if I stayed near them."

Harry felt the twinge of sorrow for both Fred and for George. "I'm sorry, Ginny."

She didn't move. "What for?"

He was going to say 'for your loss', but he'd heard it a hundred times over the past couple of days and it always seemed so meaningless. He knew and cared for Ginny too much to know that she didn't need such meaningless words. Instead, he said, "for you not being able to do that with your brother anymore."

He cursed himself for sounding so stupid. He hated that he was so awkward around her. But then again, it was an awkward subject.

"Well, to be honest, it was never much Fred's kind of thing. He only went along because George went and I think it was his way of looking out for me." She sighed as she glanced back over her shoulder and pointed at the rock he'd mentioned earlier. "This rock, you say?"

"Yeah."

He watched as she walked over to the rock. It was quite large, taller than her, but it was no match for her. She lifted her hand and rubbed her hand along the smooth surface before, in only a couple of seconds, she'd climbed atop it so she now sat, looking down upon him. It always amazed him just how agile she really was. Having grown up with his Aunt who thought women should wear dresses and be prim and proper, he realised just how much he loved that quality in her. In his opinion, she looked good in the jeans and Weasley jumper she was wearing now. She didn't need to get all dressed up to look any better. Besides, it made Quidditch all the more interesting. Unlike Cho and many of the other girls on the teams, she didn't care whether her nails got broken or her hair was out of place. She was more interested in life than in how she looked.

Harry leant against a nearby tree, picking at the hem of his cloak. Neither of them spoke, each fighting the awkwardness that had built a huge brick wall between them.

_Come on_, Harry thought. _This is just Ginny. How many times have you hung out with her?_

But this wasn't 'just Ginny'. This was the girl, the woman as he now saw her, that had shared so much with him, but also experienced so much without him. He wanted to go back to the way things were, 

although in a much more meaningful way. The time spent with her had been the best of his life, but he knew it had only been two teenagers fooling around. Something deep inside of him had stopped him from going too far because he knew it would eventually end. He wanted to tell her this, but he didn't know how she would take it. He didn't know if this was quite the appropriate time.

"So," she startled him out of his thoughts. He looked up at her but she was looking away from him.

He suddenly had the urge to be cheeky.

"So what?" he asked, a small smile on his face. He walked over to her, but instead of joining her he crouched down to the side and picked up a few sticks.

"So I was wondering for what reason you whisked me away to this romantic spot in the middle of nowhere?" He glanced up to find that she was looking at him, a slight smile on her face. It warmed his heart to see her smile, even a little one again. He liked her smile. When she smiled, she smiled with her eyes. He smiled back at her and for a brief moment, he had hope that they could get through this. However, it didn't last long and she looked away. He sighed inwardly. One moment she was sending him good signs, the other... He felt slightly frustrated, though it was directed more at himself than her. He was the one that had left her and caused this rift. He sighed again. Why did it have to be this hard?

_Nothing is ever easy_. The words came to his mind, although he wasn't quite sure where he'd heard it from.

"I'm sorry, Ginny." He heard her sigh in response.

"What for this time?" He felt slightly put out by the patronising tone in her reply but he kept his tone neutral.

"For everything that's happened to you."

"Really? Is that the best you can do?" He looked up at her, but she was refusing to look at him. Her face was blank as she looked up to the night sky. He felt his temper beginning to rise. He was trying to do his best here, but she was jumping straight at him. His own response was a little short.

"Erm, okay. How about 'I'm a prat' for starters?"

This time she did look at him, raising an eyebrow, her tone dripping with sarcasm. "Well, I already know that. Tell me something I don't know."

This wasn't the way he wanted this to be going. He cursed himself for not following his guts when he thought it was too soon to be having this conversation with her. He should have just let her go, it was only her father. Much better than this.

"Look, Ginny, I know you're hurting right now, so-"

"I'm hurting?" She jumped down from the rock and strode angrily towards him. "I'm hurting? Don't you think I already know that? Of course I'm hurting, I've just lost my brother, for Merlin's sake, and the other one is as good as dead! My mum is a total mess! Today was one of the hardest days of my life and the one person I actually thought would really understand that I don't need to hear another 'I'm sorry' or 'you're hurting, but it will all be better in time' has just gone and proven me wrong!" She broke off in tears, her words failing to get past the sobs that were racking her body. Her hands were balled up in fists as she held them against her hips.

He felt wretched for having got her to this state, but he knew that she needed an outlet for this pain. He could see from the way she was stood that the sheer force of emotion forcing its way out of her that she had been trying to keep it to herself, to lock it away. He knew she had been trying to be the strong one for her family, but she was exploding with the force of emotion within. His mind flashed back to that time in Grimmauld Place when he had lost his temper at Ron and Hermione. He'd kept everything bottled up and look where it had got him. He had not been a very nice person that year. He couldn't stand by and watch whilst she did the same thing. It just wasn't healthy.

"I'm sorry for ever thinking you would understand me!" she screamed at him.

Her words hurt him deep down and he cursed himself for not being more thoughtful. He understood just how meaningless such words are, he understood the pain and he knew that she needed someone to lash out on. It was obvious that she had no one else to rely upon at this moment – they were all grieving themselves. He had dealt with enough grief to know that he had to be that person. He wanted to be there like no one was there for him, he couldn't let that happen to her.

"Ginny, I-" He took a step towards her, but she angrily shook her hands and brought her face up to glare angrily at him.

"Don't you dare, Harry Potter. Stay away from me!"

She turned on her heel and ran away from him, her echoing sobs following her as she disappeared into the darkness.


	3. Chapter 3

She couldn't stop the tears. No matter how hard she tried, they just would not stop. She'd managed to hold them in for days, but now, now when she needed them to stop the most, they wouldn't. She hurt so much, sweet Merlin it hurt, and she wished she could just burn through the painful onslaught of thoughts that were attacking her. She knew she was stronger than this, but she just felt so weak. Especially after she'd just broken down in front of Harry, of all people. She felt so ashamed. She'd been strong all year, but now...

She'd been walking for a while, tripping and blindly tramping across uneven woodland in the dark, her mind not really taking notice of where she was going, only that she was going somewhere in the opposite direction from Harry. She realised that she was thoroughly lost in a place she'd never even heard of until half an hour ago. Damn Harry for bringing her to a place she didn't know and forcing her to get lost. And she couldn't even use her wand outside Hogwarts yet. Dejectedly, she stumbled to a stop and collapsed against an old pine. Her chest hurt, her nose was running and she could hardly breathe. Her eyes stung and she could hardly see through the tears that were streaming down her cheeks.

She keenly felt the loss of her brother; she couldn't get the image of his broken body out of her mind. She hated how his death had affected everyone in her family, especially George. It broke her heart to see George go to crack a joke and look to his side for his ever-faithful backup, but receive none. On some level, she felt naive for thinking that the whole of her family would survive this war unscathed. After all, they made up half of the Order and they'd been named 'blood traitors' ever since the last war.

But no matter how much she missed Fred, it was nothing to the guilt she felt over not feeling as much for him as she did when she had thought Harry was dead. He was her brother, for Merlin's sake, she'd been through so much with him. With Fred, it hurt deeply, but she felt her world stop completely when she saw Hagrid emerge from the Forbidden Forest, carrying Harry's body like a limp ragdoll. She had known it was always a possibility, but to see it really happening, nothing could prepare her for that. For a moment, she'd felt that life was so pointless, that it wasn't worth going on and that they might as just well give in to Tom. And then Neville, dear, brave Neville, stood up to Tom himself. That one courageous act put her to shame and everything she had been fighting for burned anew in her. In the mêlée after, she had fought for Harry, to make his death worthwhile and not wasted. In that moment, she knew that it was up to them, what was left of the resistance, to give everything they had and go down fighting.

Her legs gave way as still the emotions rose within, despite her best efforts to quash them. She remembered the moment Harry appeared from under his cloak and hope returned, stronger than ever before. The look on his face, he just looked so ... powerful in that moment, duelling as if without fear the strongest and most evil wizard the world had ever known. They'd said so many things she didn't understand, and she remembered her heart leaping from her chest when that one final spell that removed Tom and the evil he had created on this earth for good. She remembered everyone screaming, sobbing, rejoicing that it was all over, but she couldn't join in with them. This war had come at a great price; she was grateful that it was over and they were now free from the tyranny, but too many good people had lost their lives in the struggle. She remembered watching as Harry had been passed from person to person, all of them congratulating him and wanting him to join in the celebrating. But she could tell he was only just alive, that he didn't want to be with everyone, that he wanted to be anywhere else but with a hundred people he didn't know so well. She wanted to take him away, but she couldn't. She'd seen Luna approach him and he disappeared under his cloak, Ron and Hermione quickly follow after him.

She felt the anger begin to rise again. Not only had they left on this mission without her, leaving her behind to worry like she was some kind of tag-along, but they hadn't trusted her with anything. She felt locked out, shut out, left behind. She understood that the trio had a bond that she probably would never understand, but that was no excuse to leave her out. After all, hadn't she and Neville and Luna also joined them at the Department of Mysteries? Hadn't they also been involved in the fighting that 

broke out at Hogwarts the year previously? She'd fought Death Eaters and even Tom himself, so why was she left behind? She wasn't stupid and had managed to piece together bits and pieces of their mission, but she didn't like being left behind in the dark.

"_Ginny, we'll be back in a moment, just keep out of the way, keep safe..."_

"AAARRRRRGGGGHHHH!" she screamed into the night air, the sound echoing through the woods. She dimly acknowledged the sudden flight of an owl that she had just disturbed.

That was the role that everyone had forced her into, the role that she had played and hated every single moment of it. Whilst there were people out there risking their lives and actually doing something for the cause, she was cooped up in some safe place away from everyone and not doing anything useful. At least at Hogwarts she had been able to rally up the DA again and fight against the cruel and unjust punishments being dealt out to the undeserving students, do something useful. But when she'd been forced into hiding out at Aunt Muriel's she'd been imprisoned and not allowed to do anything. She could understand that her parents loved her and feared her losing her life, but didn't they see how she had hurt, that by shutting her away all she had left to do was think on the worst situations that could happen? About how much she had missed Harry, that he could have been lying dead in some gutter somewhere and she wouldn't have even known about it? He was the one that had represented hope. Throughout that terrible year, no matter what happened, she knew that if Harry was alive, there was a hope that someday this would all be over. Harry would not stop fighting, even as the last breath left his body. It made her so angry that he always asked her to 'stay safe', like she couldn't protect herself. She understood that he had important things to do and he was probably the only one in the world that could do it, but it was just so unfair sometimes.

During the battle, she'd followed Tonks for the beginning part until she'd lost her in her attempt to find Remus. She felt guilty for not doing more to find her, maybe she could have prevented her death and at least Teddy would still have a parent. She squeezed her eyes shut against the pain. She'd watched as friends and classmates had been downed, one by one. She bitterly remembered sitting beside a girl in the year below her, her body mangled, calling desperately for her mother and wanting to go home. They'd all wanted to go home, but she'd never made it. Hers was one of the bodies they'd covered with a blanket and laid in the Great Hall. That was something she never wanted to repeat again. She'd been helpless, but she was the only source of comfort for the girl in her last moments.

"Arrrrrrrgggggghhhhh!" She pounded her fists on the ground, trying to find a release for the raging emotions inside of her. The last time she'd let her emotions get the better of her she'd ended up being used by Tom. He was gone now, but she was still so scared of the strength of her feelings, her anger, her grief, her regrets, that she just locked it all away. However, that door had opened wide with those words from Harry.

She knew it wasn't his fault, but she couldn't help lashing out at him. She knew he understood at least a little of what she was going through having lost many in his short life, but then he'd uttered those words that so many people had offered her today and in the past week. The first time, she'd brushed it off, but the second time? Something had snapped deep inside of her. She wanted to be more than just a meaningless thing to him. For so long she had waited for him, and this is what happened at the first opportunity they had of seriously talking?

She'd waited for him, worried over him. The distance had only made her realise what she had had with Harry and made her want more again. But Harry had avoided her this past week and now she'd gone and shouted at him. She couldn't help it; Harry had always been the one that she could never hide herself from. She'd been keeping this from everyone, for the sake of being strong for the rest of her family, but she couldn't keep it from Harry. She felt so miserable that she was being selfish, that she wasn't there for him when he probably needed someone to talk to that wouldn't judge him or misunderstand him. Knowing Harry, he was blaming a lot on himself and being too harsh on himself for not figuring it all out sooner and saving lives. But she just couldn't deal with any more at the 

moment. She felt as though bricks were being thrown at her, and she had been catching them all until Harry had thrown one right at her stomach and knocked the wind from her. She was losing control and she didn't know what to do.

She had been in a state of emotional wreck since returning to Hogwarts, upon seeing Harry, her brother and Hermione again after so long, although she had hidden it from everyone. She had been relieved to see him, she couldn't stop smiling in that moment, even if it was just for a few seconds. She'd known in that moment that the fighting was about to start, that was it, where it would all be decided. He had looked so pale, so tired, so ... desperate that she'd nearly run straight to him. But she'd known that he didn't need anything else to weigh him down right then. She could tell he was pleased to see her by the way his gaze was caught on her when she walked through the portrait. However, he'd refused to help her side when her mother and father tried to make her go back home. Her mother was just being her overprotective self. But Harry? She'd spent the last year fighting for him, helping him in any way she could, waiting for him, fearing for him, so he had no excuse not to allow her this one request. She had to do anything she could to keep him from getting himself killed so that he had a chance to free them all.

She had spent the past week with her family, helping to comfort them, to be strong for them. Her mother was devastated by Fred's death and she'd stood by George nearly night and day. In the day time, they were all helping with the cleanup of Hogwarts and waiting for the Burrow to be rebuilt after the Death Eaters had attacked it. All around her it seemed as though the world was sewing itself back together, people being reunited and finding each other. Ron and Hermione were now an official item, which she was glad about, but being around them, seeing how happy they were with each other, how much they loved each other, just made her realise how much she didn't have and how lonely she really was.

"Why me? Why me?!" she demanded of the trees in front of her, her voice echoing through the quiet wood.

She took a deep breath and managed to get a hold on her tears. For now, at least. She sighed as she wiped her cheeks on the back of her hand. How had things worked out to be so difficult? She remembered hearing from Harry that they'd grown up thinking that the magical word was make believe and everything had a 'happily ever after' ending. If only that were true. To live out life as a magical princess that would get rescued by the man of her dreams and actually get to be with him.

She wasn't so pessimistic to rule out the potential of her and Harry in the future, she just didn't see it happening in the near so. They were both so alike in some things that until they managed to deal with this all, they would only end up lashing out and hurting each other. Although she had to admit that he had been trying his hardest tonight. She felt her heart soften slightly at his patience through her onslaught. Knowing Harry, it had to have taken something good on his part.

She looked around her, noticing that all she saw around her were trees, trees and more trees. She could barely make out the night sky from above the tree tops, let alone the stars. How was she going to get back to the castle? She didn't know how to Apparate and now her senses were starting to return, she was beginning to feel slightly uneasy about being in the woods at night on her own. Hearing a twig break somewhere behind her, she whipped her wand around, her eyes scanning the darkness for any sign. She could barely make out anything, but she didn't see any movement.

Her tears forgotten, she began to panic.

_Calm down, Weasley,_ she told herself. _You're just in some woods on a walk. You're a witch with a wand, there's nothing to be scared about._

Breathing shallowly and all her senses on high alert, she looked around the clearing, trying to remember which way she had come from. It was useless, she definitely hadn't been paying attention and she cursed herself for her own stupidity.

_Okay, so what are my options? _she tried to reason with herself_. I could climb a tree, that way I could see the general direction I'm going in and at least there'd be light up there._

She shook her head. She could hardly see in front of her, let alone enough to climb what she guessed to be about the height of a house without breaking her neck.

She heard movement again, to her right. Inching over so that she was hidden behind a thick tree trunk, she flattened herself against the bark, her wand pointing in the direction of what appeared to be someone approaching. She could see wand light through the trees and it was coming closer.

_Please let it be Harry, please let it be Harry_, she chanted in her head. She never knew, it could be one of the Death Eaters still on the run.

"Ginny?" he whispered sharply. She let out a sigh of relief.

"Harry!" Wiping her face on her sleeve, she stepped towards him, letting him know that she was there. She was glad to see him, that he had come after her.

As he brought his wand up to her, she could see his face sag with relief. He stood there looking at her, as if judging whether to say something. When he did speak, he spoke quickly, as if worried she might lash out at him.

"Look, Ginny. I'm sorry for the way I acted back there. I know what it's like to feel this pain. Don't bottle it in, shout at me, scream at me, _talk_ to me, please. Let me help you. If not me, please talk to someone."

As she looked at him, tear drops leaked from her eyes. She felt her heart soften as she realised he was worried for her and had the guts to actually say that to her. She slowly lowered her wand from where it had been trained on him and turned away so her back was to him. She could feel the sobs rising to the surface again and she didn't particularly want to break down in front of him again. She rested her hand against a nearby tree and tried to suppress the strangled noises she made as she fought to keep from crying.

"Ginny?"

Suddenly, she couldn't take it anymore. This was Harry, he knew her and she felt stupid from trying to hide this from him. She didn't care if he thought her weak, she just knew that she wanted to be in his arms. She turned around and flew at him, stumbling on the rough and uneven ground. He caught her as she collapsed against him, sobbing hysterically as she gave the emotions inside her free reign for the first time. He enclosed her in his arms, held her against his chest. She dimly felt his hands rubbing circles on her back as the world again began to squeeze inwards and the surroundings went black.

--

_A/N: Thanks to all of those reading that leave a review. I know it's angsty, but they've managed to overcome this first hurdle. Maybe we can move on towards some lighter stuff now. Your thoughts and opinions on whether I am staying true to their characters are always appreciated. Tallie_


	4. Chapter 4

After she'd stormed off, Harry had climbed up onto the rock to wait for her to return and to reflect upon what had just happened. He'd been miserable, but he knew she needed space right now and probably felt embarrassed about the way she had broken down in front of him. Although she didn't realise it, she had a right to cry and definitely no need to feel embarrassed. He could see that there was so much going on inside of her, that she had been keeping it all in so that she could be there for her mum and brothers. He had been watching the strain build as her replies got shorter, she put more effort into physical tasks and she seemed to be trying to physically wear herself out just so that she had a chance of sleeping at night. This was all too familiar a pattern to Harry and he had hoped that her family would notice what was happening. However, they all seemed to be absorbed in their own grief. He had wanted to give her space, to make sure that she didn't think he was putting pressure on her at a time like this, but it was clear that there was no one else she could go to.

But it was so hard, just trying to be there for someone who was hurting so badly and there was nothing he could do. He suddenly realised just how much of a git he had been to Ron and Hermione after Cedric, Sirius and Dumbledore had died, all because he'd kept it locked away. He'd been so embarrassed about breaking down, but still they'd been there for him. He'd shouted at them, been short tempered, ignored them. He'd been so stupid and shrouded in his own grief that he hadn't realised the effect he was having on everyone. Ginny was doing the same thing now. It hurt him to see Ginny in so much pain and not dealing with it, it really did. He didn't know how to get through to her. Did she need someone to scream at, to argue with, to cry at, to run away from? She didn't seem to know herself what she wanted, but he wanted to help her. If he could make it easier for her than it was for him, he would do anything he could.

The strength of this newfound emotion scared him. He had managed to suppress most of it last year, and not being around her made it a whole lot easier. But now it had a free reign and she was in his arms, the power of it was like nothing he had ever experienced before. He was glad Voldemort was gone from his head because he definitely would have felt this. She was the one he had thought of in what he thought was his last moment. She was the one that had allowed him to face death without fear. She was the one that had allowed him to defeat Voldemort. She was the one that gave him strength. Even though all around them was grief, it was she that gave him hope for the future, something he'd never thought possible. This new hope was something he wasn't prepared to give up and he would protect it the best he could. If she would let him, that was.

When she hadn't come back after half an hour, he had started to worry. It had taken him no longer than a minute to realise that she didn't know where she was or where she was going and he cursed himself for his stupidity. He had set off after her, his thoughts racing and his heart in his throat. It had been easy to follow her tracks; she had not been paying attention to where she was going and had obviously stumbled through the undergrowth, leaving a wide trail in her wake. He'd been prepared for her to hex him so he blurted out what he needed to say before she had a chance. He'd thought she was going to run away again, but she completely surprised him when she ran at him. There'd not been much room in the woods and he knew it wasn't safe enough to stay there so he had Apparated them back to Hogwarts. He stumbled slightly as the Great Lake came into view, reaching out a hand to steady them. Ginny was still crying so he sat down with his back against a tree and just held her, waiting for her tears to run their course.

This was definitely a side of Ginny that he'd never seen before. She'd always been so strong, refusing to let anything get through that wall. He'd never seen her so upset before; he guessed it was a case of so many things happening and all coming to a head at once. She saw this as a weakness, he saw it as strength. After all, wasn't it by the power of love that he'd managed to defeat Voldemort?

He felt her shift slightly and he tightened his grip on her, as if frightened she'd try to move away. He wondered whether this meant that she'd accepted him. At the moment, all he knew was that she'd allowed him to be there. But was it as a friend or something more? He sure hoped it was something more, but realised that they had to start somewhere.

His mind wandered as he sat there, holding Ginny as she cried. He thought of the many people who were going through this stage of mourning, of all the pain that was left in the world at the moment. He felt despair at all of those people who had lost their loved ones, especially those like Teddy, like him, who would never know their parents. Teddy would grow up hearing people tell him stories of how his mum and dad got together or how they were at school, how much he looked like either one of them or how much he acted like them. But there would still be that emptiness inside him, that longing to know what might have been. He felt his head fall back against the trunk. If anything he felt angry at Tonks and Remus for thoughtlessly diving into the battle without thought of what would happen if they never came back. He immediately felt guilty when he realised that they had only done what his parents had done; they had sacrificed themselves so that future generations could live on.

He looked out over the lake, recognising the spot where he first thought he'd seen his father casting the Patronus charm and saving him from the Dementors.

_You're avenged, Mum, Dad, now you can rest in peace_, he thought.

In a way, he felt as though it was a chapter of a book closing. This was really what had started his personal battle; if Voldemort hadn't killed his parents, Harry would never have had the determination to finally succeed.

He dimly grasped that although he had felt so much pain and gone through so much grief, that experience was what made life all the more worthwhile. He always remembered the hugs Mrs Weasley gave him, but would those moments mean so much to him if he'd had his own family? Just those few glorious months he'd spent with Ginny last year had given him the strength to go on, but the threat of losing it all had made him realise just exactly what he would be missing and really appreciate just how lucky he was to still be here breathing. He didn't want to look back on his life in twenty years time and regret the decisions he had made, he had to live life now. He didn't want to be like Dumbledore.

He was jolted from his own thoughts when he felt Ginny pull away from him and wipe her eyes. He felt the loss as her warmth moved away, so he dropped his arm back to his side. She took a deep breath before scooting around so she was sitting beside him, her shoulder touching his. When she looked up at him, her eyes were dry, but puffy and red. He felt relieved that he could see some of the brown come back at him.

"Sorry about that," she murmured, blushing slightly as she motioned to his shirt. He noticed the way her hair curled out around her face and felt the sudden urge to brush it away. _Live life_, he thought as he acted on the impulse, his skin grazing her forehead as he tucked it behind her ear.

"It's okay," he replied, waving his wand to dry out his shirt. "How are you feeling?"

She looked at him for a few moments before replying. "I can't say this is the best I've ever felt in my life, I just feel...empty. Sorry for losing it like that back there, I know you didn't deserve it."

"That's good. That you let it out, I mean, not that you lost it at me, or that I didn't deserve it," he stammered. "You just needed a shoulder to cry on for a little while."

"Mmmm."

He felt her shift again and rest her head against his shoulder. They were quiet for a while. The silence dragged on until finally she spoke.

"I've never experienced death so up close and personal before. It's a fact of life and this was a war. But somehow, I wasn't expecting it to be so... so..." she broke off, not able to find the right words.

"Final? Inconsiderate? Unfair? Cruel?" He felt her nod at his suggestions. He knew exactly what she meant. How could he not?

"Do you still miss Sirius?"

The question took him a little by surprise. "Yeah. But you get angry, you grieve and then you adjust and get on with life. I figured that he'd not want me to mope around thinking of the past, but he'd want me to do something with my future."

She sighed. "That's true. I can imagine Fred coming back to join Peeves, just to make sure that we weren't all depressed. He was never happy unless other people were laughing and he and George made it their job to make others laugh. It's just hard...especially when I see George."

This time he did put his arm around her and squeezed. "I know. I miss him too."

She rested her head against his shoulder and they sat in silence. The mood had changed; the silence was no longer awkward or uncomfortable. Somehow, they had managed to find a hand hold on that brick wall. There was still a way to go, but at least the hard bit was over and done with.

"You should go back to bed," Harry remarked as Ginny tried unsuccessfully to stifle a yawn. She shrugged her shoulders.

"I guess you're right. Crying was such an exhausting activity." She got up and stretched, brushing the grass off from her jeans. She turned back to look down upon him. Her face was illuminated by the moonlight and he could see that her eyes were no longer watery, and her stance was less resigned. She managed a small smile.

"Thank you, Harry," she whispered before turning and walking back to the castle.

"Sleep well," he whispered after her, leaving him to his thoughts.

* * *

_A/N: Thank you for your encouraging comments so far. I know that there has been very little dialogue up until now, but I didn't feel as if it was in character. They were grieving and felt awkward around each other, and what else do you do when your like that but get angry or be silent?_

_Just the one chapter to go._

_Thanks for reading. Tallie :)_


	5. Chapter 5

"Check!"

Ginny sighed as she returned her attention to the board in front of her and tried to work out a way that didn't mean she'd lose. After dinner, they'd come back to the common room and Ron had challenged her to a game of Wizards chess. Not having anything else better to do, she'd agreed, but her mind hadn't been one hundred percent focused on the game. Sprawled on the floor by the fire, her mind was in a numb haze.

She was thinking about Harry and what had happened last night. She had to admit that she felt better than she had yesterday; although the hurt was still there, it wasn't as overpowering and she knew now that there'd eventually be an end to the all-consuming nature of it. People would grieve, but they would adjust, just like Harry said. Those that had died had sacrificed their lives for those that were still living to go on; she couldn't cheapen that.

Even though she'd had quite a late night, she'd woken up early. She'd felt the need to visit the one place she'd avoided since the funeral: Fred's grave. She had stood there for nearly an hour, remembering everything he'd ever done to make her laugh, everything that had made her cry, everything he'd done to protect her from the evils of the world. Him and George had helped to keep the fear spread by the Death Eaters at bay by keeping everyone's spirits uplifted. She smiled sadly now at the two words she'd added to his gravestone: _mischief managed_.

She'd gone to breakfast after that. She'd sat down at the table filled with her other family members and felt really grateful that she was still here. She'd caught the hug and support her father gave her mother when he left for work. She'd noticed the motherly attentions her mother was smothering over every one of her children. She'd also seen the way that Ron and Hermione had looked at each other when they reached out for the same piece of toast. This was what life was about, it was the people around you that helped you to survive these times and it was those people you loved that helped you to reach happier times.

And then she'd seen Harry and the shame had set in.

Looking at him then, he had been physically present at the table, but his mind was miles away. She'd been so absorbed in her own grief that she'd completely ignored how he must be feeling. She'd been so selfish last night, making everything out to be about her. Even when the post came and Ron managed to pick out a very lacy pair of pants, he only managed a small smile. She'd seen the looks between Ron and Hermione that said 'he's brooding again'. He'd caught her eyes a couple of times during breakfast, but none of them more than a couple of seconds. In them, she'd not seen happiness.

"King to F3," she ordered, and her piece moved out from harm's way.

She'd sat by the lake for most of the afternoon, contemplating her thoughts. She'd watched as Harry, Ron and a dozen other male helpers cleared rocks from the bottom of the lake. Apparently, the Giant Squid had narrowly escaped death by flying rocks when the Death Eaters destroyed part of the castle. It had taken them the best part of a day, but at least now the Giant Squid had enough room to play about in and would pester walkers by no longer. She had skipped lunch and Harry seemed to have skipped dinner, not having come back to the common room. She hoped that there would be an opportunity to talk to him, but he hadn't appeared.

They turned at the sound of someone coming in through the portrait. Hermione entered carrying what looked to be a dozen old books under her arms.

"Hermione, I know you like reading, but you don't have to take the whole of the library with you; it's not going to go anywhere," Ron commented, earning himself a glare. Hermione relieved herself of her burden and plonked herself on the sofa behind Ron with a sigh.

"I'm just doing some last minute research on memory charm reversals," she replied, reaching out her hand to rest in Ron's hair. When he turned around and smiled at her, Ginny felt a twang of envy.

"When are you leaving for Australia?" Ginny asked.

"Oh, soon, I hope. I managed to get the house sorted out today, so as soon as the Portkey application is accepted really." Ron reached up and squeezed Hermione's hand before returning to the game. Hermione sighed, picked up one of the books and began to read, her hand still absently stroking Ron's hair.

Ginny looked at the older girl sitting across from her. They'd shared some of their life stories in the holidays spent together, but there was still so much she didn't know about Hermione. She had to admit that she was, at times, insanely jealous of Hermione's relationship with Harry. Not to mention that she was the one that had spent the last year with him. She wasn't jealous in the sense that she thought Hermione loved Harry in a boyfriend/girlfriend kind of way, she was devoted to Ron, but just that she was the strongest female influence in his life. She'd given up her family so that she could go and help Harry out.

"Checkmate! It took long enough, but I finally showed you who the Weasley champion is at Wizard's Chess."

"Yeah, Weasley is our King!" she snorted, scooping her pieces into a bag and watching as Ron coloured. Turning to Hermione, she asked, "Did you see Harry on the way up?"

Hermione looked up from her reading. "No I didn't. He skipped dinner."

"Kingsley caught up with us as we were going to the hall, said he wanted to talk to Harry about some 'important issue'," Ron snorted. "Probably wants to make him the next Minister of Magic."

"Ron, don't say that. You know how annoying he finds it," Hermione replied.

"What, he'd make a better Minister than all of the previous ones. He actually cares about the people, not his image," Ron retorted.

"That being so, we shouldn't leave him to brood too long by himself." Hermione looked at her then, a question in her eyes.

Ginny got up and stretched, nodding imperceptibly. "Well, I'm going to see if I can persuade Kreacher to give me some leftover treacle tart."

Walking towards the portrait, she half expected Hermione to say something to her, but it was Ron who surprised her.

"Ginny?" She turned back to her brother's piercing gaze. "Just be careful, okay? I don't just mean Harry, I mean you as well. This past few months have left some wounds that may take a while to heal."

She reappraised her brother there and then. Sometimes he really did surprise her with just how sensitive to other people he was. She gave a small smile and nod, leaving them and climbed out the portrait.

* * *

After securing a whole treacle tart that was now wrapped up in cling film, she wandered outside to the spot where she'd left Harry last night. He'd told her last year that this was his favourite thinking spot, so she guessed he would be out here somewhere, contemplating the world. However, when she arrived by the lake, she could see no one. Deciding that it was a nice night and not wanting to lose three quarters of the tart to Ron by going back, she sat on the bank and tucked into the deliciously sticky pudding.

"Three courses are never enough for any Weasley, I see."

Ginny jumped, somehow managing to pull her wand, turn around and save the pie from falling on the floor at the same time.

"Harry!" she cried as he materialised out of thin air. "Stop with the scaring me like that."

Harry gave her a small smile and sat down next to her. "Sorry, but it's fun seeing you react like that. I'm impressed that you didn't drop the tart, but then again I shouldn't be surprised with the Weasley food-loving genes."

"Hey, you make us out to sound like fat pigs that all we ever do is think about our stomachs or eat," she retorted, poking her tongue out at him. She held out her bounty. "Want some?"

"Wow, did a Weasley just offer me some of their food?"

Harry ducked aside as her fist darted towards his arm. "Oi, be nice else I am fully capable of finishing this myself."

They resorted to silence as they ate, both managing to finish the tart between them in no time. She noticed that Harry was staring off over the lake, his eyes dark in the dusky light.

"What are you thinking?" she asked quietly.

He didn't answer her and she was about to repeat the question when he sighed and looked over to her. His eyes were dark, but penetrating.

"The future," he replied. "Kingsley asked me if I wanted to join the Aurors earlier today, said he'd accept me even without NEWTs."

"That's great, Harry!" She frowned at his lack of excitement. "Isn't that what you want?"

He tilted his head to the side and hooked one arm around his knee. "To be honest, I don't really know what I want. This vengeance quest with Voldemort has filled my thoughts, but now he's gone, it's like I can do anything."

She nodded, licking the last traces of sugar from her fingers. "So what else have you thought about doing?"

"Well, it's been a dream of mine since I saw my first broomstick that I'd like to play professional Quidditch. But Quidditch has always been more of a hobby, something I can pick up or put down, something I can escape to."

"I'm sure many fan girls will faint in disappointment to hear you say that," Ginny smirked. _I certainly would,_ she thought.

"Hmmph. Quidditch is good, it's just..." Harry faltered, not knowing how to complete it.

"Even though you'll get the chance to kick some arse, there won't be many opportunities to save people," she finished.

He raised an eyebrow. "I wouldn't put it so bluntly, but being an Auror seems a more... worthwhile career than Quidditch."

She understood where he was coming from; that was the essence of Harry's nature. He only felt good if he was doing something for the greater good.

"So are you going to take it?" she asked.

"Probably, although not straight away." He looked at her before looking away over the lake again. "I just need some time to take a break, travel maybe."

She watched him. He had been through so much in just a short space of time. And throughout it all, he had managed to keep his morals and keep grounded by the things that made him who he was. Yet now, as she watched him, he seemed lonely, distant, as if he was trying to keep everything in check. She felt the overwhelming urge to hug him, to comfort him. So much had happened and so much time had been wasted apart; did it really matter about the past? Acting on the urge, she rose up on her knees and threw her arms around him.

"Ginny?"

She felt his arms tighten around her. She resisted the urge to cry again, not for herself, but for the way the world had treated this person that had given so much of himself to its cause in such an unfair way. She was also proud of him of the way he had stood up for everyone, risen to the challenge and conquered over evil. The Boy Who Lived Again seemed like a strong and noble person, but the person in front of her now was just Harry Potter, the boy who was lost. She hugged him closer, pulling him into her, trying to give him all the comfort she could. She felt him respond in kind and felt his glasses pull on her hair as pressed his face into her neck.

They stayed like that, silently listening to the lapping waters of the lake in front of them until she started to lose circulation in her legs. She pulled back, grimacing slightly as she lost a few strands of hair to Harry's glasses. His eyes were shining as he looked at her.

"Ginny...I..." He stumbled on his words and looked away. She grabbed his chin, pulling his gaze back to hers.

"Harry, just say it. We've been step-toeing around each other for too long and it's really ridiculous if you think about it."

"I missed you." She saw him close his eyes and take a deep breath. He squeezed her waist as he held her in front of him. "So much. Everyday."

"Me too, Harry," she replied, smiling lightly at him. He didn't return the smile, but brought his hand up to her face, brushing away the hair there.

"I know I hurt you by leaving you here. I know that you're angry with me for wandering off without you, but honestly, I don't regret it." He frowned slightly as he realised what he had said. "I don't mean I regret spending the time away from you, just that I don't regret leaving you here. I am sorry for hurting you, Ginny."

Ginny felt the anger inside of her, felt the jealousy, the anguish of the past rise up. But she realised just how meaningless it was in the now.

"Harry, I forgive you. After all, I was nothing more to you than a girl in the year below you that you had a few laughs with a few nights a week." She saw him begin to argue, but shook her head. "Please, Harry, listen. We both knew that it was just a fling, something that would end as soon as Tom came between us, no matter what feelings we began to develop. Back then, we were just a boy and a girl, taking advantage of being teenagers without responsibility."

She took a deep breath and looked into his eyes. "Harry, I...I want to be here with you again. Being apart made me realise that, well, I more than like you and I want something more than a fling that only lasts until the next crisis comes along. I can't go through that again, Harry. Not knowing how you were, if you were lying in a ditch somewhere, not even able to do a single thing about it if you were. I know it had to happen, but I want to move on from there."

His eyes were so dark that she couldn't really tell what he was thinking. And then he sighed. He looked like he was struggling with something and she was slightly disappointed when he gently pushed her away from him and stood up. He took a small, round stone from his pocket and brushed it over with his thumb as he spoke, his gaze concentrated on the stone. When he spoke, his voice was low.

"I hate to say it, but I agree with you that what we had a year ago, even though it was the happiest time of my life, was not so fulfilling as it seemed back then. I was not really in the state of mind for a proper relationship, and this sounds like I was just using you, but I wasn't. I just didn't know any better. Deep down, I knew eventually that it was going to be me against Voldemort. Even through that small amount of time we had together, I knew enough to know that I didn't want you to get caught in the cross-fire again."

"But the first time, it wasn't about you," she said, frowning.

He looked over at her, his eyes sad. "It was, Ginny. It's always been about me. The diary was a Horcrux – a piece of Voldemort's soul. It had always been his plan to be immortal, but I came along and upset that. Ever since Trelawney had a prophecy about me being the one that would eventually have the power to defeat him, he did all he can to get rid of me, no matter who stood in the way."

She could see what he was thinking; he was blaming himself for all those deaths. "Harry, like you had a choice! Did you make Trelawney have that prophecy? Did you make Tom believe those words? Whether you believe in prophecy or not, it was his belief that it was the truth that made him do what he did!"

"I know, I know," he pleaded with her. "What I was trying to say was that Tom would always be there between us until one of us died trying to kill the other. I know what it felt like to have him in your head and I didn't want that for anyone, especially you again. My mind was so focussed on him and I feared him finding out how I felt about you that I was just too immature at that stage to think about a proper relationship."

He looked out over the lake again. "There wasn't a day this past year where I didn't think about you at least once. There were times when it was just so...lonely and it all seemed so hopeless, like it would have been easier to give up than to figure out the stupid riddles people kept sending us. Sometimes, when I was carrying the locket, I forgot what I was fighting for. However, all I had to do was think of you and what would happen if he ever got his hands on you, and it would give me the strength to get up the next day and carry on."

She frowned slightly at the mention of the locket, not understanding, but she didn't want to interrupt him.

"Ginny, when I..." he broke off again. She was silent, waiting for him to find the right words and the courage to tell her what he was thinking. He'd not often shared his thoughts like this with anyone, she was the same, and it wasn't exactly the easiest thing in the world to do.

He took a deep breath and grimaced at her. "Sorry. I keep trying to explain things, but it's hard when I realise how much you don't know. I'm so sorry, Ginny."

"Don't be sorry, Harry. Just say it, if I don't understand, I'll ask."

"When Voldemort killed my parents, his almost-death left part of his soul within my body, turning me into a Horcrux. It was because of this Horcrux that I could speak Parseltongue and we had that horrible connection. The only way that he could ever truly be defeated was if all of the Horcruxes he had made were destroyed, else he'd just go back into a state of nearly-dead as he did after he attacked my parents."

"How many Horcrux things did he make?" Ginny asked. She realised now that that was what their 'mission' had been about this last year, even though she didn't quite understand exactly what a Horcrux was.

Harry sighed again. "Seven. His ring, the diary, the cup, the locket, the Diadem, the snake and the part of him inside me."

Only three of those things made sense to her.

"In order to destroy that part of him inside of me, I had to face death without fear, without worry and it had to be by my choosing. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, choosing to sacrifice everything I had so that those I'd leave behind would stand a chance for freedom." His voice was gravelly and he looked down at the ground. "I'm not entirely sure exactly how it happened, but somehow because he had used my blood to resurrect himself two years ago, it was his part of soul that was destroyed with that killing curse, not mine."

With a sudden lurch, Harry swept out his arm and threw the stone across the lake where it skimmed, five, six, seven times before dropping under the surface. He stood there, his back to her, his voice quiet.

"It was because of you that I was able to face death without fear. At the moment he cast his _Avada Kadvra_, I was thinking of you, remembering your fire, your smile, what it felt like when you kissed me, the safety I felt when I just lay beside you in the sunshine, the sight of you on a broomstick..."

He now turned and knelt by her, taking her hands in his. His eyes were bright and watery, and his gaze intense.

"Do you see, Ginny, how much you mean to me? What started out with maybe a teenage crush grew up with such force that you gave me the power to defeat Voldemort." He looked away towards the castle. "For years Dumbledore has been telling me that love is the strongest power on this earth, and I never really believed him until now."

Ginny was speechless. She felt something bubbling up from inside of her, something she'd never felt before. It was warm, no hot, and she felt difficulty in drawing a breath.

"Ginny, I don't want to hide it or control it anymore. I want you to be more than just a meaningless teenage crush. I know it probably sounds foolish that an eighteen year old wizard is saying such things, considering I am a teenage wizard." He shrugged, his eyes seeking hers again. "I just wanted to you to know what I felt before you made up your mind. You don't have to decide now, you can-oomph!"

He didn't get a chance to finish the sentence and Ginny had thrown herself at him, planting her lips on his and kissing him for all he was worth. She felt the roughness of his chapped lips and tasted the sweetness of the treacle tart. All her frustration, her anger, her sorrow, her hope, she put it into that kiss and hoped for the world that he was able to feel every last bit of it. She didn't care that his glasses were nudging her nose, nor did she care if he could taste her tears. All she cared about was that he knew she was there and intended to be there from this point onwards.

He was the first to pull back, gasping for breath. She saw wetness on his cheeks to match her own. He pulled her head forward and kissed her cheeks where the tears had fallen, promptly causing more to fall in their place. He chuckled.

"Those had better be tears of happiness, otherwise I've definitely got something wrong with my technique."

She laughed, her smile fighting through the tears. "There's nothing wrong... with your technique... I'm just...oh Harry."

She hugged him again. This time, he lay back on the bank, pulling her on top of his chest. She snuggled closer as he stroked her hair. She felt his chest vibrate as he spoke.

"After Voldemort fired that killing curse at me I guess you could say that I was stuck in limbo, somewhere in-between worlds. In that world, for just half an hour ... it didn't hurt there. I wasn't in pain, I had no responsibility pressing down upon me, people didn't hate me, people didn't die, people weren't relying on me. I got an explanation for everything I asked, something I've never really received much of in this world and I got to see Dumbledore again, one last time."

She felt him take a deep breath. "I can't say that I haven't sometimes wished I was back there, especially with all that has happened this week, but that would have been the easy way out. I could have made the simple choice to go on, to not come back and face this world. If only I had taken that train, I could have left all the pain behind."

"But you're not that person."

He lifted his head and looked down to see her eyes bright with understanding. He sighed deeply, letting his head fall back.

"Nope, I'm not. Besides, I would have been stupid to miss feeling what I'm feeling now. This is incomparable to that nothingness. I'm not going to leave you again, Ginny, I promise."

"You'd better not else you'll have more than a few Bogeys to worry about," she replied teasingly.

He squeezed her arms and she sighed again. There was so much that she didn't understand, but at least she knew that he was going to be here to explain it in the future.

"I love you, Ginny Weasley."

She laughed, she couldn't help it. How long had she been dreaming, how many different scenarios had she imagined him saying those words to her? And yet, this was as perfect and as unexpected as any of them. She pushed herself up so she was leaning on her elbows either side of his head. His eyes were dark and green and full of life and love. Reaching out and brushing a finger over the lightning bolt scar, she only hoped that hers reflected the same.

"I love you too, Harry Potter," she replied, leaning down to meet her lips with his.

-_The End_-

* * *

_A/N: Thank you all to those who've got this far. Please let me know what you think of my writing, any constructive comments can only help me to improve._

_Thanks again for reading. Tallie :)_


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